Been years after I stop writing isn't it. Holla!



Hi and Assalamualaikum,

It’s 2018 already! How time flies. So, we’re gonna talk about what the header said. As everyone knows, the gossips has been spreading all over Malaysia already, the very top hot ‘selebrity news’ about Sufian Suhaimi and Elfira Loy. Well, I don’t really want to take part in this kind of gossip  because, you know, I know that it’s always hurt when we are either left or being left. It’s always been the saddest part of our life. But out of all these, there is always something that we need to learn and take it as a lesson of life.

Sometimes when we’re happy, we have that eagerness to show to people out there what we’re doing, what we have and even what’s going on now with our life. Well people, some things are not good to show your things off to the public. Sometimes it may eat us up, in a way,  we get ashamed when people knows we don’t own it anymore. However, in terms of people, we as a musleem need to believe that god has arranged the sequence of human that will come and go and stay in our life. Jodoh is takdir, takdir falls onto believing in qadak and qadar. Everything has been written. Oh ya, just a friendly reminder here I’m not talking here religiously, about god and islam because I wanna show you that I am alim and sort of (some people just view me as ustazah lol xD they better live under my ketiak bij). No, this is the truth thing. Everyone has experience person/people we give our love to, sacrificing feelings and everything but in the end of the day, they left. It’s god plan. They may not have the intention to leave, but situation asked them to do so.

Back to the topic, I saw a lot of shameless things in my twitter, some are promoting to download an apps of which to find a sugar daddy. Girl, do you even know that having sugar daddy is a shameful thing to tell people? Sometimes these kids gotta learn what is considered as malu and what kind of thing should be spread to people. And a recent video of ‘manja girl’ who was hungry and wanna eat cendol. To the boyfriend, yes we know your girl is cute. Yes she is. But please keep the video to yourself, no need to publish it to the public. Because some things are meant to be secret and private. People are getting eager telling others of thing that is very inappropriate :’)

Nah, it’s okay lah. We knew what’s good and what’s not should be enough to survive already. I am not good either to really differentiate what shouldn’t be expose to the public and what should, you know sometimes I do expose myself, my problems, my life or even my so-called ‘privacy’. I’m still new to a so-called ‘professional life’. I’m still young in this adulthood life, just 2 years entering this new phase of life in which sometimes I acted like a whole bullshits and bitchy. I mean, I’m just human and a freaking woman. I decide too fast, I don’t do long thinking, I said whatever that satisfies my anger, I do ridiculous actions. I’m just tryna expose who I am most of the time and sometimes it goes wrong 🤣 Life is all about learning. It’s a learning process each and every moment. Take lesson and improve ourselves.

If we’re not ready to pass through something that is so hard for us to overcome, it’s okay to sit still and enjoy the time we have. They said YOLO. When the time comes, that’s mean we’re ready enough to go through it. If you said life is unfair, you’re wrong. Life is fair because it’s always been unfair to everyone of us. Fair enough right? Think and reflect ourselves.

So that’s all for my first post in 2018. Hope you guys have a wonderful year in 2018! May all good comes all the way to us and we can be better than previous year!

Love,
Pia, Opie, whatever you call me!





UPDATE:
Time          :   2250
Place          :   Room 322, Block A1, MAHSA University, SPC
Mood         :   Missing someone

Hey,
I'm missing you so bad now and I realized that we didn't talked much today since I was so busy studying and I'm sorry if I make you feel I was ignoring :')

I'm sorry, I miss you. Badly. Just want you to be here; right beside me :') Like always ...

Good Night :)

By: 2254


UPDATE:
Time          :   1208
Place          :   Room 322, Block A1, MAHSA University, SPC
Mood         :   :')

It's been 2 days since I was thinking about something. Basically, it is something that I afraid the most in my life. I remember every single word I heard and I couldn't help myself from stop thinking about it. I meant.. You know. I've never been in such situation. I never bumped into a life that I was once really afraid of, well I meant even until now.. But the way we think could have been changing from time to time so.. even more I never want to befriend with someone that had done things that was so wrong, either in the culture itself or in the religion itself.


In this surah, it started to enlighten how Allah S.W.T has warned us to not even come near to any path of zina (the sexual intercourse). So yeah, can you see how Islam takes Zina as a real big issue in life? To exaggerate more on this, let see this ayat:
There are so much ayat that tell us how Zina is a really forbidden action and listed one of the huge sins among all the sins we make. There is reason why marriage is a good thing to do and why sexual intercourse among husband and wife can get reward. There is reason. For me, what's bygone is bygone. But what matter the most is, have you repent on doing thing that is damn prohibited in our religion? We are staying in not our own dunya remember? We are the guest? If the adulterer has really repent and promise not to do it again, they'll never tell people what they had done. If you still talk about it, people don't think that you regret of what you've done before. It's zina! It's gross! Would you mind if I said it's second-hand? Or is it so much insulting? It's zina. I cry. I repeat again to satisfy myself, it's Zina. Allahu. Save me Allah.. Allah, meet me with someone that will take me in a really honorable way to be his queen and save me from zina. I am really afraid. Save me from zina. SAVE me and the readers.

Have a real good day everyone ;')

by: 1245


UPDATE:
Time          :   0313
Place          :   Room 322, Block A1, MAHSA University, SPC
Mood         :   :')

Hey, it's 30 April 2017. If I am still with my first boyfriend, this date would marked us being together for 6 years :) But, it was ended somewhere on 2012. So I was just finished my 'work-out' but yeah can't feel like sleeping. Too fresh already LMAO. So what I was doing was.. I'm reading back a diary that I wrote everything about someone I loved too deep. There was moments that I cried, I laughed, I smiled.

I'm sorry. Whenever I feel hurt, I reread something that makes me happy again. I reread something that could makes me feel, I was once being prioritized by someone that I could say 'half-mine'. I could feel the real feeling of 'owning'. At least. I'm sorry for always keep myself being longing for someone that I couldn't have him back;forever. Sorry that I can't yet move on. Sorry that I somehow have the feeling that I wanna have all of you with me. It just that I can't do that.  I was hoping/am still hoping you can replace him; but. Never mind. I'm already broken and I want you to know I am okay if I have to back off someday; I realized the fact that you aren't mine. I'm sorry if I always talk about him. I love to tell you how he makes me feel.



Good Night ;')

by: 0326


UPDATE:
Time          :   0008
Place          :   Room 322, Block A1, MAHSA University, SPC
Mood         :   :')

"Beg for the wrong person to stay yet give choices to the right person, whether to stay or left". I am clueless by this sentence that I saw in twitter; it's my friend's tweet. I meant.. It is really relatable with what had just happened today. I know, I've been thinking a lot, I've been so overthinking, over frighten over something that is not yet happen. I am now realized why I have that sad soul.

You know, people comes and go. But, I always came to someone's life when they're totally broken, fucked up and down. It is just, I was there when they are in their worst. You can always say I came at the wrong time and you know, for million times, they said to me "I wish I knew you earlier". I am used to that kind of sentence. But. Sad thing over all, they finally left when they found new happiness. They left me their sadness. I am always being a sad soul because I carry the longing and memories that I gave to the broken one. I picked their fallen pieces but in the end what they did was tearing up my own pieces. I think that is the reason why I HATE knowing new people, it's always me that come to someone else's life when they are at their worst. Yes, it is always me.

I find beauty in their sad souls. I fell for that beauty that I always feel people that left them are stupid. But, in the end my pointing finger point back at me. And yes, it is always me that become their choices, not a priority. And yet always hoping to become someone's princess that they afraid of losing. Maybe, I ditched them all when I found someone's broken. Yes, in the end, I am the mistake. I made mistake. I always am.

Good Night ;')

by: 0023


UPDATE:
Time          :   1352
Place          :   LRT heading to Putra Height (IDK where the hell is this?)
Mood         :   Come back way too early LOL XD

I hate how I'm not doing anything with my life like I am young and I should be having fun but instead I am always on this website or watching movies on netflix/youtube and it just gives me such a bad feeling because I know that one day I'll look back and I'll be like, " Why the fvck did I waste my youth just moping around when I could have done so many cool things" but fvck  I just don't know how to stop being like this. Back to the room and then again and again, repeat all those thing that I regret for this moment. LOL

by: 1402

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